Dog In The Street EXCLUSIVE!!!
By Polly Amorous – Nudge Nudge, Wink Wink Correspondent
In an interview with Dutch newspaper De Babbleblabber, Southampton megastar Virgil Van Jerk claims he has already learned more in his short stint in Southampton than he learned during the TWO YEARS he spent in Glasgow.
“There’s no comparison,” explained the Dutch ultrastar and Southampton legend. “The Southampton porn stars are simply in a different league.”
Asked to explain the difference, Van Jerk elaborated:
“The pace is much quicker down here. It’s like being in a pinball machine with the balls flying about everywhere. I’ve struggled at times to keep my concentration, but I’ve learned more in the past few weeks in Southampton than I did in my two years in Glasgow. I’ve really improved my technique and I should be ready for a move to Liverpool by Christmas. After that, it’s Barcelona or bust – if you’ll pardon the pun.”
Van Jerk believes he is a nailed-on certainty to get his big-money move if he keeps up his present level of performance.
“Mind you, I’ll be nailed-on to the wall if my girlfriend ever gets to hear about this,” the self-proclaimed ‘greatest performer of all time’ added with a chuckle.
Dog in the Street 